Adjusting in Istanbul

Preparing to move to Istanbul was a 4 month process. It began with planning the flight, when, how, cost. After the flight was settled I had to focus on where I was going to store my stuff, what I was going to do with my car, and who exactly I would have take care of my cats and personal belongings that I needed kept out of storage. Well, luckily for me, the cat caretaker was easy...my mom. But everything else was very stressful at times! Needless to say, with the stress of preparing the US for my departure, I hardly had time to anticipate how I would feel moving halfway around the world.



On the flights here I felt completly confident. I had no worries of being homesick. I think I was still in the mindset of just getting to Istanbul. I do remember waiting at the Chicago airport, sitting among the passengers waiting to board Turkish Air, along with the passengers waiting to board Mexican Air (or something) at the next gate, thinking, "will I feel homesick once I get there?" (Side note: I was asked a couple of times if I was flying to Mexico.) I've always wondered what it was like to feel homesick. I was always such a social person as kid, so I always had a place to go no matter how far from "home" I was. I grew up in Cali, but when I was 13 my family moved to Arizona. So while my family was in AZ, visiting friends and family in Cali for weeks at a time was never too bad. I guess there is also the fact that I look forward to the future (sometimes too much) and know that eventually I will be "home" again. So, I wondered what being away from US for a year would do to me. Well, it's been a month (that has gone relatively quickly) and I am surprisingly doing better than I expected. Then again, I didn't have any expectations as to how I would feel. I guess I should just call it a successful month given that I am not back in the States yet.



From the beginning I have had extreme bouts with crazy dreams. Even crazier than my normal dreams!!! Dreams that connected my life in the US with my life in Istanbul. Though I would occasionally wake up wondering if my time in Istanbul was through, I really was grateful for the dreams as a way to sort things out. They are the only real signs of being homesick I think that I have felt. Well, occasionally I miss Target. MMM Migros is just not the same. Actually, now I am worried about returning to the US and feeling homesick for Istanbul! I mean, it's not like it will be a quick little trip to visit. Anyway, the dreams have slowly stopped being so intense and consuming. During the days I am completely content being here. I get out and venture occasionally, but I have really not been pushing myself to do too much out of fear that I will get bored with the city. I know I haven't seen much yet, but it already seems a little small. And if I lose interest in the city, I will lose interest in being here, which would mean I would become bored...and I am not a fan of being bored!

So basically, I began this blog to see how I was really feeling. Conclusion: I really think I am mentally doing okay with being 10's of thousands of miles away. Either that or I will become completely insane when it hits me. Still wondering if a deeper fear of being away will.